Comic 50 - Dodge roll

2nd May 2018, 10:11 PM in Humble Beginnings at Humblestart
Average Rating: 5 (1 votes) Rate this comic
Dodge roll
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Author Notes:

Morgenstern 2nd May 2018, 10:11 PM edit delete
Morgenstern
The best you can guess is that Lagrand is telling you to dodge. Maybe he's planning a huge special attack, or maybe he's just expecting the statue to fall on its face. Either way, you ready yourself--

the statue breaks through Lagrand's brambles, charging forward with its sword raised. You make a huuuge dive to the side, rolling past it as it rushes by. You narrowly avoid getting cleaved in half by its massive sword. ...Or more likely crushed, as the sword is dull and (possibly?) made of stone.

You get to your feet, earning a slightly bewildered look from Lagrand. "Not quite what I was going for, but good on you for the follow through. You haven't had that Wind Wand very long, have you?"

The big, fairy-filled statue begins to turn around.

Lagrand continues. "Wands are never forged with a single, simple purpose. They're an attempt to bestow great power to those that lack it--and to broaden a mage's abilities, narrowing the gap between mere man and archmage. If you swing your wand differently, I'm quite sure you'll find... let's say, auxiliary functions."

The statue comes to face you. It tightens its grip on its weapon, preparing for another attack. You shout at the fairies that it's not a human war you're trying to stop, it's between slimes and goblins.

"AND IT DEPENDS ON SOMEBODY HAVING SEX WITH GOBLINS?!," the voice booms. You hear a lot of giggling from elsewhere in the armor. "YOU'RE JUST BEING SILLY NOW."

"...To be fair," Lagrand states, "it is quite a yarn."

Comments:

Twyll 2nd May 2018, 11:29 PM edit delete reply
No really, seriously, it does. Just start telling them about it (while being ready to dodge again if necessary), make it as entertaining as possible, see if it gets them to calm down to hear such a ridiculous tale.

(Also, we should ask Lagrand to teach us more about how to use our wand, sometime soon ;D)
Guest 3rd May 2018, 5:13 AM edit delete reply
Which "wand"?
Mochi 3rd May 2018, 9:53 AM edit delete reply
Mochi
yes
Twyll 3rd May 2018, 10:23 AM edit delete reply
Exactly!
Tech 2nd May 2018, 11:56 PM edit delete reply
Wield the wand as a sword.
Szled 3rd May 2018, 12:15 AM edit delete reply
Ask if they are willing to come to the slimekings cave to negotiate, we are NOT here to fight!
Szled 3rd May 2018, 12:19 AM edit delete reply
Also, the glow seems to have faded from the helm, maybe we shoukd check that out...
Krylo 3rd May 2018, 2:08 AM edit delete reply
Try swinging the wind wand horizontally as Lagrand was gesturing with his arm to see what happens.

Also, explain the entire story about the slimes and the goblins.
Benjerbro 3rd May 2018, 6:40 AM edit delete reply
+1 to explaining race war in greater detail